What You Learnt in the Classroom Was Useless

For copywriting, that is. I'm an English teacher, so I know it.

Let's face it – the only thing English class essays and killer copy have in common is the alphabet.

As an English teacher by day and a copywriting by night, I’ve come to realise the rules of school are about as relevant to copywriting as Shakespeare is to TikTok.

Every day, I teach the 5-paragraph essay (intro, 3 main body paragraphs, conclusion), topic sentences and what/how/why sentences. I teach students to NOT start sentences with connectives. To use the full range of punctuation for variety and flair. And to use complex sentences peppered with adverb/verb combinations.

My VCE class just sat at their final exam armed with a battalion of sophisticated ideas, vocab and grade-winning structures.

While my English class will teach you to appreciate a finely placed semi-colon, my copywriting will sell you the semi-colon necklace. It's not about ditching what you've learned; it’s about knowing when to use it and when to say, "Thanks, but no thanks."

By day, a teacher who accidentally dresses like her colleagues.

The New Copywriting Curriculum

So if the rules of English class won't prep you for the world of copywriting where engagement and sales are king, what do you do?

Here’s a run down of a few essentials:

1. Hook, not handbook: Ditch the formal thesis. Your first sentence should snag your reader’s attention, not present a roadmap for an essay.

2. Flexibility, not formula: A rigid structure limits creativity. Copywriting is about shaping your message to the moment, not padding out a five-paragraph frame.

3. Break the mold: Goodbye, strict grammar rules. Copywriting thrives on playful language, powerful fragments, and sentences that start with 'and' or 'but'.

4. Simplicity sells: While academic writing is dense, copywriting is direct. It's about clear, conversational language that resonates, not impresses.

5. Be real: Authenticity trumps verbosity. Speak to the reader as you would in a genuine conversation, not like you're delivering a lecture.

By night, breaking all the fashion and copywriting rules.

Takeaway? 📖

English class is great for the basics and setting kids up for university, but real-world copywriting plays by a different set of rules.

It’s about engaging and converting, not just composing and concluding.

So, if you wanna be a copywriter, or to write your own business copy, do a foundational course in copywriting and Bob’s Your uncle (or Fanny’s your aunt), you’ve got a shot at your words working for you.

If it’s still too hard…better call Suze. 📞

Until the next time,

Mwah. 💋